Gift of the Present/The Present Gift

Five Minute Friday: Gift

March 30, 2012

Around here we write for five minutes flat on Fridays.

We set a timer, throw caution to the winds and try to remember what it was like to just write without worrying if it’s just right or not.

Want to play Five Minute Friday? It’s easy peasy!

1. Write for 5 minutes flat on the prompt- no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. Meet & encourage someone who linked up before you.

OK, are you ready? Give us your best five minutes on:

Gift…

I have been reminded a lot recently of how the present is one of the greatest gifts we can live and give to those we love.  By not holding back, by not rushing forward, but by entering or engaging ourselves as fully as we can in the present, we give a gift. 

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It’s too easy accept unnecessary distractions as priority over that which is our true responsibility/primacy.  It’s too easy to allow even good things to pull us away from connecting our heart-strings to those with whom we have been called to serve/interact.  For me, that’s my children.  I can rush from one responsibility to another, from one goal to another, without truly engaging with my heart to that which connects.  It takes time to weave the connections of hearts.  It takes an immersing of myself into another’s life.  It takes the focus of my heart to focus on the hearts of my children, to enter into their lives, absorb their dreams, their goals.  When I stop and absorb the present/engage the present, I experience the gift of the present.

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STOP!

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Where Have the Past Nine Months Gone?

I can hardly believe that my little girl is now nine months old!  I wish I could pin these days down.  My little girl won’t be a baby for much longer.  The months that I can still call her a baby I savor yet.  I try to kiss her cheeks a few extra times.  I enjoy each time I get to nurse her, even though her little teeth are making the experience not so pleasant these days. 

These moments of holding her close in my arms and of her sweet innocence are so fleeting.  In my heart, I freeze these moments.  I love each part of my little baby — chubby sweetness, baby giggles, slobbery kisses, and hearing her say “Mum.” 

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My baby is growing so fast, and it is fun to see how she is growing in comparison with the rest of the family.  The following are our stats.:

9 Months Old:

Olivia: 28 3/4 inches long; 19 pounds, 11.5 ounces; 18 inches head circumference

Luke: 28 1/2 inches long; 22 pounds; 19 inches head circumference

Drew: 29 inches long; 20 pounds, 4-5 ounces; 18 1/2 inches head circumference

Will: 29 inches long (at 10 months); 21.5 pounds; 18 3/4 inches head circumference

Amy: 28 inches long; 16 pounds, 10.5 ounces

Jonathan: 29 3/4 inches long: 19 pounds 12 ounces; between 18 1/4 to 18 3/4 inches head circumference (8th and 10th month measurements for head)

So much love this Mommy holds in her heart for her little girl!  Precious, Olivia, I love you so much!

Maestro of My Soul

I’ve been thinking about sounds…  Sounds fill my world from sun up to sun down and in between as well.  Some days, I feel that I am hearing a constant cacophony of sound.  The sounds aren’t always peaceful.  I want to imagine that my world is full of peaceful, harmonious sounds.  I want to dream that I smile and laugh all day, that my kids smile and laugh all day, that my husband smiles and laughs all day, that my world smiles and laughs all day.  Some of the sounds though are discordant.  I want to squelch those sounds.  I want to just dispose of all that is unpleasant.  I don’t want reminders that this world can be ugly at times.

I start to become depressed.  My feelings are telling me that I am ineffective, unimportant.  So much deafening noise — noise surrounding me but mostly noise inside me, the noise of defeat.

There are sounds everywhere.  I can hear sounds even in the stillness.  I can hear the joyful sounds of children playing and laughing or babies giggling.  I can hear the sounds of a friend’s voice — one I haven’t spoken with in years.  Pleasant sounds!  I can hear my husband coming home — relief always comes with that sound!  I can hear the song of grace, whispering to me or crashing into a wild crescendo of unrestrained joy.

In recent days, I have heard mostly the discordant sounds.  Children fighting.  Angry words.  Irritable thoughts.  I wish I could just curl up and close myself off for a few days.  That’s not happening though when you’re a mom and wife.  God asks me to keep playing the music, even in my weakness, in the dissonance.

…keep playing the music.

I don’t have poetic words of beauty or profound words of wisdom in these moments.  I do know though that regardless of my ability to hear it at the time, life’s music is playing all around.

My life is writing a symphony, directed by the Maestro of my soul.  Each part of my day plays a musical score.  There are the deep bass notes but running alongside and trilling above are also the accompanying high notes.  The music swirls, ebbs, and rises again.  What music do I choose to hear?  What music is my life playing?

The conductor of my soul directs.  Do I follow?  What is the music of my soul?

The beauty is not in the weakness.  The beauty is found in playing His music even in my weakness.  I may feel inadequate, defeated. 

I may not see how the musical score of my day plays into the symphony of my life, but every sound my soul makes is its own musical score.

When I follow the Maestro of my soul, the music is harmonious, glorious, melodious.  When I refuse to accept defeat, to be silenced/when I play on, the musical score of grace soars, harmonizes, creates beauty within my life.

My weak soul waits, watches, follows, and hears the musical score, ponders its grace, and plays onWhat is the symphony of my soul?